"Bundle of Joy" and other phrases that should go away

I have a love/hate relationship with media coverage of celebrity pregnancy/birth. On the one hand, I LOVE babies. I mean, I just love love love babies. I love pregnant bellies, I love hearing about pregnancy, I love seeing baby pictures, I love hearing about birth. However, as someone who spent most of her college years picking apart mass media (and as someone who had a rather difficult postpartum period), I absolutely cringe when I read an article about a new celebrity mom. Without fail it will include phrases such as "bundle of joy", "the proud parents", "angel", "Mom and Baby are doing great!", and "already in love with the baby".

This post is coming in the midst of the Kim Kardashian birth media circus -- according to different sources, she gave birth to a baby girl on Saturday, anywhere from 3 to 5 weeks "early"; she possibly suffered from preeclampsia; no one knows the name of this baby; the parents have not yet released any details to the media. Now I respect their decisions to not release photos or any other information -- she's THEIR baby and they'll do what feels right. The problem comes when we've been saturated with Kim K gossip for ... well, YEARS ... and suddenly are cut off. We are in Kimye withdrawal and are scrounging for any piece of information, even if it's assumptions and conjecture.

So here's the point I want to make, which can come up with ANY new mom. When the media says "she's in love with the baby already", that is ALSO assumption and conjecture. We do not know ANYTHING about how mom is feeling about the baby or her birth. And we are unlikely to see a real picture of it at all. The media calls them "proud parents", but we don't know if they're proud; People.com says "Mom and baby are doing great". Why? Because that's what you say. E! News calls the baby a "bundle of joy"; she may be a bundle of fear, anxiety, and complications for all we know.

Yes, there's usually joy when a baby is born, but what if there's not? We are saturated with the coverage of the lives of celebrities, to the point where we see that coverage as "real" and what "should" happen for everyone. When all we see or hear about is happy moms and content babies, many of us develop unrealistic expectations of what new motherhood looks like. Then, when we are at home suffering from Postpartum Depression or taking care of a colicy baby, we may wonder what is wrong us ... instead of wondering what is wrong with US Weekly.

So new moms: put down tabloids and turn off the reality TV for an hour and find a local new moms group. You may still find that woman who sees here baby as a "bundle of joy", but you're probably also going to find that mom who's having trouble and wants to throw her baby out the window.



Next week ... why are we mentioning C-sections in an article about Kate Middleton's nursery plans? Oh, I forgot, because surgery is no big deal. (NOT!)

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